The first three Ashramas are quite indicative of their contents & utility.
In our ‘Hindu view of life’, one qualifies to be called a ‘sanyasi’ after the attainment of the age of 75 yrs. i.e. one has to work hard for 75 yrs. to earn this title called ‘sanyasi’. It is not an age of retirement but a turning point in one’s life. it is a phase of change over where in masculine way of life is rather rapidly changed into intellectual lifestyle.
It is a position of pleasure and privilege in one’s life time.
During old age or so called ‘Sanyas’, we have both the wealth and culture. Wealth of knowledge and culture of experience!
Though some of us become physically weak, may be because of some ailment- acute or chronic. This can be compensated by yoga & meditation because you need a ‘healthy body to lodge a healthy mind’.
Illnesses (sicknesses) come & go. This phenomenon occurs since the day one to the last day of life. We always conquer over the diseases & hence continue to live. Conventionally, When disease comes in old age, we lose our hearts, morale goes down and we surrender to disease.
Unfortunately, social & intellectual atmosphere all over the globe is such that, as age advances, we get depressed and loose our morale. This is further enhanced by the Information available on audio Visual clippings and other written matter of similar nature. Somehow in old age an attitude of ‘wait and watch’ creeps in and we are hesitant to take steps to ‘face and solve’ the problem.
This attitude of ‘inertia & wait’ pushes us in to a state of ‘Melancholia’, spontaneous and or reactive.
During this journey of 75 years, there are many islands of thought blocks that come in every one’s life. We ignore them, overlook them, neglect them for want of time, economic limitations, social compulsions, or lack of knowledge.
Old age is the golden era of life if you are living in joint family. You are the boss with no responsibility. The generation next is robust, physically active and mentally alert. They listen to your suggestions and commands.
You have a team of small children to play & fondle with, to listen their chats & tell them your stories.
Why is the Joint family system is breaking away?
A word of caution about joint family system. It is breaking fast, not because of children but because of the elders. It is the ego, dominating nature & obstinacy on part of elders that generates the feeling of revenge & retaliation in the mind of younger generation. After all ‘ obstinacy breeds obstinacy ‘.
27 Comments
Can’t deny truth
Dr. N.C. Gupta has taken good step to make people aware of the old age problem
it is in fact the most flaming problem of our society.it seems as if he has peeped deeplly inside the hearts of old age people.
In very few words he has touched every aspect related to this problem.Rather I will say that he has filled (gagar mein sagar) .
In the old times people had so much of patience and had time for others, now life is very fast and so much to do.
The various age groups and age gaps gives different point of views which then in turn creates a difference.. joint family system like in other countries is now becoming a distant idea in India.
Although, personally I would like a joint family but people are now becoming such strong individuals that compromising for each other is difficult.
Excellent presentation
Really a nice and well illustrated article about problems of old age.With the growing facilities and advancement in medical care available, these days the life span is increasing ,thereby no. Of people in Sanyas Ashram is on the rise.
Real problem starts here, Many old couples are lonely as their children and grand children are settled abroad due to lack of proper educational and job opportunities.
Lack of infrastructure and basic amenities in India.
Rampant corruption and unhygienic living conditions deter children from returning to India, despite their best desires.
So old couples have no choice except to live alone .
They can not go and settle with children due to,
1 Declining health
2 Poor medical facilities abroad especially for visitors
3 Children and Grandchildren are all pre occupied with their own work or studies and you are almost a misfit in that environment.
Keeping all this in mind it is best to live in India and try to find some vocational avenues to keep busy for self and society at large.
My Dear Dr. Agarwal,
Before writing any reply on your comments I wish to confirm if your complete name is Dr. Yogesh Mohan Agarwal. If it is so are you a general surgeon had worked in Railways for few years and then settled down at Panchkula in your private Nursing Home.
We have established this Association for the care of the aged. Please go through the website in details and you may find some more interesting blogs / pages.
You have rightly mentioned in detail and your suggestion “Keeping all this in mind it is best to live in India and try to find some vocational avenues to keep busy for self and society at large”. Can we collectively take up this matter with the Government of India and suggest something complete that how the old individuals who are mentally and physically fit to take up some part time work so that remain busy and this will help the society at large. Would you like to be a member of this Association and the chairman for this cause of the aged. If so Kindly open ‘Join’ tab and complete the proforma online for making the subscription through bank transfer, please follow the instructions provided their in.
Truly a good read.
The life of all human beings has changed after the advent of internet and mobile, people are engrossed in their small screens and even young kids are doing the same. People now live in their own small space where there is less to no space for anybody.
But the unconditional love and blessings showered by the elderly cannot be replaced by anything.
The article relating to old age problems is worth reading. We must pause for a while to ponder over the views/ suggestions expressed by different personalities.A little care by our younger generation towards our elders helps them realize that their lives are worth living and they are not burden on their families. Better late than never.
1. Very well written about our system of living
and nicely described
2. Our systems have changed due to family planning
Now children don’t live with Grandparents unless business is common
Old people require 4 things
1. house of their own
2. Physical mobility
3.Financial Independence
4.companion
If anything is not there there are difficulties
Children need to be tutored all the time
When Grand Parents used to live together their used to be lot of guidance but not anymore
Nicely written and described the Indian Joint family system
All the systems changed due to
1 family planning one child or two children has changed the things sometimes for better and sometimes worst
2 At old age besides mobility good bank balance is most important
3 Prime requirement is your own house and your companion presence and financial independence from children takes care of everything
Our system has not failed but our way of life has changed from the past where all finance was controlled by eldest having Pagdi on his head
The write up by Dr. Gupta is an excellent contribution to the society for which any amount of appreciation and commendation falls short of the desired level. The grown ups and seniors are aware of some of the issues raised and discussed by Dr Gupta but the young minds are almost ignorant of these. My wishful thinking is that this article or its contents
should be made part of the syllabus of school going children and college going young minds.
Very good writing.joint family system is the best remedy for India.Education system needs improvement,reminding children about our culture n teaching the respect for parents n Gurus.
Excellent presentation thanks for sharing
Thanks.
Discuss in your group.
Let us make it a global movement.
Care of the aged is need of the hour. Our social system has become so deteriorated that once a child is married. He wants to live separate from the parents and moreover the jobs of the children are such that they leave their parents to earn their livelihood. The solution will be, we should inculcate the SANSKAR of the children from the early life and show them practically the advantage of joint families and must impress upon them the drawbacks of nuclear families. There should be a mass movement otherwise most of the elders will ruin their later life in ashrams and nursing homes.
True exposition of the behaviour of young couples.
But Elders are also responsible.
They have learned something from us also as well.
It calls for introspection by elders.
Many says age is a number, however time has its own toll affecting both body and mind. Aging population increase world over increasing due to better health services and I individual care, and this trend is very much seen in our country too. Domiciliary care of aged has delayed oncoming memory deficits, emotional support keep seniors busy continuing thier purpose of life; and palliative care by the families inculcate the best value to live life, to the youngester. Such simple measures can be followed by one and all which will go longway addressing the objective of healthy aging.
Thanks for the appreciation.
Care of the ‘old’ is a real a social problem.
In this decade of ‘old’, WHO should consider joint family system as a solution to the problem.
Dr Gupta has highlighted the importance of Healthy mind and body to keep up the 5 cluses of functional ability in an aged individual. If these five clauses are not achieved collectively and even one not up to mark, the other clauses are also affected.
If old individual is with his children and the grand children he forgets the sufferings of old age. Instead of crutches if two shoulders of the grand children are available for an old person for mobility he rather walks with a grandeur feeling. In such situations the old man is in Heaven.
Thanks. Dr Bansal
Care of the ‘old’ is being is being recognized as a universal truth.
You have rightly emphasised that a support to the elderly by the family members is far more cherishable than by best of the medical contraptions.
Dr Gupta has highlighted the importance of Healthy mind and body to keep up the 5 cluses of functional ability in an aged individual. If these five clauses are not achieved collectively and even one not up to mark, the other clauses are also affected.
If old individual is with his children, grand children he forgets the sufferings of old age. Instead of crutches if two shoulders of the grand children are available for an old person for mobility he rather walks with a grandeur feeling. In such situations the old man is in Heaven.
Really nice article, outlining the values of living in a family. Globally, people are looking and paying for experience. Elderly or ‘aged’ as one would say, are the ones with experience. It’s time we reap the benefits of their wisdom and rich know how
Excellent Article / post sir.
Very well written sir….thank you for sharing your thoughts!
It is a great effort and wonderful information you have made on our website blog. Well done Sir.
Very true.
Joint family system should be made a social movement.
WHO should consider it.
Thanks. Dr Bansal
Care of the ‘old’ is being is being recognized as a universal truth.
You have rightly emphasised that a support to the elderly by the family members is far more cherishable than by best of the medical contraptions.